Blood Relatives

I am a little emotional today and adoption and the circumstances around adoption are very heavy on my heart these days. With the earthquake in Haiti and the devastation it has left and will leave for a long time on an already poor nation; my heart is heavy for this country and it's people; it's children especially. At one time we had looked into adopting from Haiti and the tears were just brimming this morning as I heard more details on the earthquake.

That aside, a lot is stirring in me and I am going to quote from a devotional I picked up on a whim quite awhile ago that is touching my heart quite deeply today.

It is titled "Meditations for Adoptive Parents", written by Vernell Klassen Miller.

Page 18, the Fourth Day is about Blood Relatives

To quote a portion: "It seems that building a family by adoption threatens many people-as though they believe that if their family lacked an awareness of genetic relatedness, there would be no other relatedness. They claim that people on every side of adoption are prone to feelings of disconnectedness, rejection, and low self-esteem. Some are. But research shows that these feelings are more common in families built only by birth! (If biological bonds insure stable families, where do all the children in foster care come from?)"

She goes into another paragraph or two elaborating on this more, but I especially was touched by this from the meditation.

"Christians can agree that the Bible advises us not to place too much emphasis on genealogies. Our focus is rather to be on the importance of faith. Without the link of faith, we are not, in an eternal sense, related to our children, whether born to us or adopted. And with faith's linkage we are blood relatives forever."

The prayer for the day is then this: "Oh, God, help us remember that all relatedness is temporary, unless it is made permanent through Jesus' precious blood. Amen."Amen indeed.

Now of course I am not trying to take away from the fact that adopted children have a history before they were adopted into their forever homes, and that that history is not important; of course it is. My point is to somewhat put a different perspective on those that cannot understand adoption from the point of the questions I and others may get like, "Don't you want to have children of your own?" and etc.

So in conclusion for today I leave you with an unknown author's poem that is also printed in this meditation book.

LEGACY OF AN ADOPTED CHILD

Once there were two women
Who never knew each other.
One you do not remember.
The other, you call mother.

Two different lives shaped your one.
One became your guiding star.
The other, you call mother.

The first gave you life,
And the second taught you to live in it.
The first gave you the need for love,
And the second was there to give it.

One gave you a nationality.
The other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent.
The other gave you aim.

One gave you emotions.
The other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile.
The other dried your tears.

One gave you up- it was all that she could do.
The other prayed for a child,
And God led her straight to you.

And now you ask me through your tears,
The age-old question through the years.

Heredity or environment- which are you the product of?
Neither, my Darling, neither:
Just two different kinds of love!